Kakarotto's Balls
by Salome Sensei
Summary: An epic tale of obsession that began in seven 100-word drabbles and may now never end.  Featured on Topless Robot and LJ's weeping-cock!  Adults only, please.  50 new 1-sentence delights up, July 2011.
1. Kakarotto's Balls

Kakarotto's Balls

Warnings (a.k.a. causes for celebration): testicular obsession, perverse humor.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Toriyama's characters or their testicles.

Saiyajin balls should reek, Kakarotto. They should give a rich stink of glorious and untamed power. Worthy Saiyajin balls summon soldiers to war and lovers to fuck, no matter how well armored they are. Whether hidden beneath many-layered garments or bared to the heavens, Saiyajin balls are worthy, compelling, magnificent. But yours balls, Kakarotto, are pitifiul. You have third-class berries, light-scented and uncommanding when they should be heavy, overripe fruit. Lesser warrior of a lesser family, it should not surprise me that your balls are inferior. And yet, they call to me, Kakarotto and I must know why. I must.

Ah, Kakarotto, I watch you bare yourself in the stream, cleaning your sweaty, hard-muscled body. Cool water drips from your tangled hair, runs in rivulets down your back, trickles into the crack of your ass. The chill tightens your balls. They shrink and wrinkle beneath your lazy cock. I lick my lips. You wash them with casual indifference. My hands curl into fists. What are you doing? Grip them firmly! Massage and tug them! Invoke their power! Release the fragrant strength to compel both ally and enemy! Oh fool, you know nothing, and I will not stoop to teach you.

I test you when you are unaware, Kakarotto. In peacetime there is too little to do, too much talk and too little action. We eat at the same table. The women serve us, and we let them. My hands slips into my pants where it cannot be seen. Your woman babbles, oblivious. The blue-haired vixen senses something, but only vaguely. Her suspicion hardens my cock. Her shrewd shrewishness lured me to impregnate her. But never mind. It is your attention I seek. Smell me, fool. Recognize your Prince. I tug and squeeze. You look into my eyes. I summon you.

You tell me I need a bath "or something," and I laugh openly. The woman questions you, tells you I showered that morning. I don't need her to defend me, but I enjoy your reaction. I smell like "an animal," do I, Kakarotto? I step closer, and you sniff my armpit. No, child of the homeworld who does not know what it means to be Saiyajin, that is not whence the rich aroma arises. I grip my package and shake it at you. You tell me to fuck off, and I chuckle again. The dance moves us both, doesn't it?

I wake, sweating and shuddering in the night. I sit up, throw off tangled blankets that lack the warmth of Saiyan furs remembered from childhood. My mouth is dry; the nightmare lingers. I'm on my knees, gagged not by Freeza's hard white fist but by your soft hairy balls, Kakarotto. Sweet torture! It's you who should kneel, should lathe my regal testicles with your subservient, inferior tongue! In dream as in life, you were born to serve. But my sleeping world has so long been filled with torment, I should not be surprised. I lick my lips with open longing.

"You're gonna suck my balls," I growl, a thread of desperation in my voice as I pin you to the floor of the gravity chamber. The blue-haired female has left us to our "training," and I can stand no more. You cock your head, chuckle, push against my grip. We're both the worse for wear, our garments torn and bodies glistening, and your Saiyajin balls are calling to me. They're wrong, all wrong, but the need is right. As I fumble with my belt, you press your luck, throwing me over your head into the wall with a cockeyed grin.

No longer will I allow you and your inferior balls to torment me, Kakarotto. You can smell my princely superiority, yet you do not bow to it. I will prove my worthiness and you will confess it. I will show you what you and your balls could become under my control. I find you, alone and napping, and act without hesitation. I bind you hard and release your cock and your twin globes. You protest, struggling, as I extend a commanding tongue. But I suck you well, and at last you yield. Together, we share your perfect testicular submission, Kakarotto.


	2. Vegeta's Vengeance

Author's Note: With all the fun I had with "Kakarotto's Balls," I couldn't help thinking SEQUEL! With the kind assistance of the LJ community "Kill Your OTP," I have attained a 15-prompt table through which to extend the testiculartasticness into another batch of 100-word tidbits. The numbers and prompts listed below come from the Kill Your OTP "anti-ship table."

Summary: Having given himself over to the disturbing allure of Kakarotto, Vegeta determines to reassert control and dominance. Yeah, right.

Warnings: Uke!Vegeta, testicle obsession, foul-mouthed yaoi goodness. 

**Vegeta's Vengeance**

#1 Grow Apart

How long have I lain here in a testicle funk-induced haze, Kakarotto? How long have my noble Saiyajin nostrils been filled with the sickly smell of your sac, my lips coated with third-class spunk? No matter. I will think no further about the loneliness of a prince without a homeworld and the depths it drove him to. I know what I must do. Yes, I knelt before you, desperate for a taste of home, but that is over now. I will reclaim myself and be rid of you. I'll wipe the grin off your face for once and for all.

#2 Anger

There is no wrath like a Saiyajin's wrath, Kakarotto. As my fist crashes into your jaw, I teach you to respect the honor I do you when I tongue your filthy balls. As my boot smashes into your back, I remind you that fucking me can never make you more than a low-grade warrior. And as my ki soars and blasts of power shoot you down from the sky, I show you that I am, now and always, your prince. I can't remove the taint of this pitiful planet upon you, but I will beat some sense into you, Kakarotto.

#3 Apathy

You smile at me, lying sweaty and languid, arms folded behind your head. Could it be you think that when I let you fuck me it proves your worthiness somehow? Ha! Cease your idiot dreams. I couldn't care less what you think. You will never understand what it truly means to be Saiyajin or the gift I have given you to slake the tiniest portion of my princely lust. Listen well: I could make you bow down before me if I wished. But such effort would only fuel your self-delusion. I know who I am, Kakarotto, with or without you.

#4 Cheat

I see you, Kakarotto, crawling back to your woman. So much easier to face her petty possessiveness than your true destiny as a Saiyajin, isn't it? The prince has recognized you, and yet you deny your fate. I have seen you, lying beneath her as she rides the hard shaft that by rights belongs to me. She is a feeble lover, and yet you return to her, time and again. Come, Kakarotto, I know the allure of the female, but I am not fool enough to lose myself in its swollen folds! Does she lick your balls, Kakarotto? Does she?

#5 Betrayal

Surely my royal eyes deceive me, Kakarotto! I have bestowed my beating, my fuck, and my generosity upon you despite your grotesque unworthiness, and how do you repay your prince? Was it not enough to accept that I must share you with your female? I have taken the blue-haired bitch to my bed to show how little your treachery matters to me in my greatness. But you dare insult me further? Do not think I did not see you at the waterfall, letting Piccolo taste your sweet Saiyajin balls! Such betrayal will not be tolerated, Kakarotto, not by Prince Vegeta!


	3. Vegeta's Vengeance, continued

Author's Note: The "vengeance" continues. (Oh, Vegeta, you delicious masochist you.)

**Vegeta's Vengance, continued**

#6 Different

What is this, Kakarotto? Do you dare hold my gaze now? Grin at me in that childish manner? You wanted me to see you, pleasuring your woman, toying with that defective Namekian. You think to shift power, to claim a status that is not yours by birthright or temperament! And you know I will not tolerate it. No matter the subtle allure of your Saiyajin balls to my regal palate, Kakarotto, this will not stand. I will shun you, and you will know what disgrace it is to lose the attentions and the fuck of the one true Saiyajin prince.

#7 Another

See, Kakarotto, what your greed has wrought? It has been months since I permitted you to fuck me, to bask in the feel of my tongue on your testicles. You pretend not to care, but you cannot fool your prince. I know you long for what once was. I smell the pure Saiyajin hunger that oozes from your every pore. And you, no doubt, can smell my woman, ripe with child. Yes, ungrateful and unworthy traitor, I have turned from you and given her my seed. See how she swells! Let it burn through you: your betrayal has brought this.  
#8 Three

My bitch and my babe, they sustain me. She cares for us both, far better than your purile shrew. And she will aid me in making my heir a proper warrior. I fuck her well, Kakarotto, and often. It is not the same; it cannot be. But it is what you have forced upon us all. It doesn't matter whether you bear a dozen offspring, or a dozen dozen. My bitch and my babe alone have earned my protection. They will ever serve and respect me, as is my due. May you suffer and pine for me, as is yours.

#9 Jealousy

Have I not suffered enough, Kakarotto? Made to live as a maniac's slave for long, terrible years. Freeza misused me in ways words cannot express, and my reward is to be a prince without a home or a people, while the one remaining who should serve me will not. How could I have expected anything else? Though your scent calls to me – oh precious Saiyajin balls! – you do not come. I boil with rage and jealousy that you seem so content while I can never be. Alas, is it perhaps better to be a third-rate warrior than a unworshipped prince?

#10 Divorce

So, it is done, Kakarotto. While you selfishly move beyond my reach, I renounce you. You relinquish your responsibilities to your woman, your children, your prince. You flee to the afterlife. Pretend that the world is safer if you are not in it! If tears fall from my noble eyes, it is for the wrong you have done your race, Kakarotto. Never again will I smell your third-rate balls! Never again will I be tempted to lessen myself in craving their taste! Never again will you show your devotion by filling me with your hard, low-class cock! It is done.


	4. Vegeta's Vengeance, concluded

A/N: This completes the "Kill Your OTP" table, but there will be more!

#11 Distance

Visions of Saiyajin balls come to me in the night. Your balls. I toss and turn, sweat and fume, wake crying out my agony. It was not difficult to talk my woman into beating the obsession out of me. She took to cracking the whip as she takes to everything I desire of her, and my back is now welted with her blows. Drive out the visions, Bulma. Free me from that which I can no longer have. Without planet, without subjects, without purpose. All I see before me are your balls, Kakarotto. And I cannot bear it any longer.

#12 Crush

It is too much. I am lost and feverish, delirious. The gravity is too dense and my mind misgives. My strength wanes! Is it you, Kakarotto, sitting on my face in the early mornings, smothering me with the pale moistness of testicles too sweet to endure? When I startle awake, you are gone and I am crushed by your absence even more than I was by your presence. Father, I cry out to you: is it better to be dead than to endure an empty cosmos, bereft of even one to worship us, even one to share his Saiyajin balls?

#13 Communication

I hear your laugh, Kakarotto, foolish and mocking. I cannot close my ears to the sound that maddens me. Return, you coward, and face me. Bring back the balls that belong to me, to your Prince. Let me again weigh them in my palm, press them with my mighty lips, own them as only the Saiyajin heir may. I tire of this game, of your inane chuckle that echoes in my mind. Give me back what is mine my birth, by right, by command! Accept your place while I still permit it. My tongue will bear witness to your submission.

#14 Change

Your human woman rejoices at your unexpected homecoming. Your half-breed offspring cheer your glorious return. They embrace you, feed you, cherish you. But I respond as a prince, one has long expected you. My heart hammers in my chest, my hands ball into fists, my cock hardens to aching. I force myself to stillness. I hold myself in readiness. I will not come to you, Kakarotto, though your testes call to me louder than any battlecry. Let others celebrate your reappearance. They are fools. Only I know the true meaning of your arrival. Only I know you return to me.

#15 Time

You leave almost as suddenly as you arrived. I deny the insult you attempt to place upon me. I will not deign to decry your departure any more than I celebrated your arrival. Be gone! Stay away as long as your foolish whims lead. I am no sparring partner, to be used for practice. I am no lover, to be toyed with. I am no mate, to whom to offer broken promises. I am your Prince, Kakarotto, your one true destiny. Your balls belong to me, now and always, and I will claim and own them, however long the wait.


	5. Damn You, Kakarotto

A/N: The obsession continues, as it must.

**Damn You, Kakarotto**

"Get on your knees, Vegeta."

You appear suddenly before me, the glow of the afterlife in your eyes and a grin spreading across your foolish face. How long have you been gone this time? How many months have you looked down at me from the beyond while I know nothing of your existence? How long have I been resisting the thought of you and your Saiyajin balls?

"Get on your knees, Vegeta."

You speak, and what you say penetrates the fiery ache in the depth of my soul. I stutter and sputter my rage. The injustice! You will never truly know the injustice of it, Kakarotto. I swing but miss you, and you appear behind me.

"Get on your knees, Vegeta."

The words strike me like a mighty fist that strikes my skull and leaves me senseless. They savage me like a sword's edge that severs my limbs and amputates my confidence. They rend me like a dragon's claws that rip open my chest and draw forth my life's blood. I roar with loathing as you fold your arms across your chest and smile.

"Get on your knees, Vegeta."

Tailless, homeless, unworshipped and unknown: it is sacrilege that your words bring me such a vision of myself! Did I not suffer enough, kidnapped as a child and forced to serve an ignoble and sadistic master, to watch my father and my homeworld destroyed, to claw my way back to freedom and proclaim my birthright? My title remains true, my royal blood still pumps supremacy through my veins. But you, unworthy warrior, infantile remnant of a once-glorious world, declare yourself this planet's champion and actually believe such a claim has value.

"Get on your knees, Vegeta."

Damn you! Damn your blithe, cocky demeanor. Damn your denial of your heritage. Damn your unwillingness to serve as you were born to serve. Even here, on my knees, as you rub your stiff, wet cock across my face and tempt me with the inescapable allure of your treacherous Saiyajin balls, I damn you, Kakarotto.


	6. Oozaru Moon

Note: Another little tasty tidbit. My thanks to Talon for inspiring me to write DBZ like this.

Warnings: Bad taste, teabagging.

**Oozaru Moon**

I feel my body, its massive power, as I have not felt it in many long years. The full moon pours down its light and I am nothing but massive, raw power, the Saiyajin ape who destroys lives and planets with equal abandon. How I came to this world or this state, I do not know, but I roar my pleasure at it. I glory in my soul, a rampant, wanton mass, furred and fanged and nearly mindless but for the love of my own ascendancy.

And then I see you, Kakarotto. And my Saiyajin balls rejoice. They tingle, they throb, they swell.

I stalk you with a single-mindedness I did not know I could find in this form. My every step lands with determination and feral dominance. You flee, but there is nowhere to hide. And then, so easily, I am upon you.

You curse my name, cry your outrage, but we both know this has been a long time coming and nothing will stop it now. I crouch, presenting my ass, my massive, furred testicles sinking lower and lower until they find you. I rock my potent hips, swathing and blanketing your face, your chest, your own miserable little third-class cock and those most unworthy balls. Be honored as you smother beneath me, Kakarotto. Know my magnificence at last, and die in that knowledge.

But even as I reap my vengeance, I sense there is something wrong. The moon grows brighter, ever brighter, until I see that it is not the moon but the sun! The sun of this miserable little planet that you were sent to destroy.

I wake, then, with the woman's knee in my back, telling me to cease my snoring. Snoring, indeed. Those were roars, I tell her, and turn onto my other side.


	7. The Orbit of a Prince's Orb Obsession

4 July 2011!

Note: I celebrate U.S. Independence with Vegeta's testicular dependence. Thanks to LJ community "1sentence" for the fabulous prompts and the unique challenge of one-sentence fic.

**The Orbit of a Prince's Orb Obsession**

**a one-sentence fic collection  
**

#01 - Motion

How they move, Kakarotto, those Saiyajin balls: your body in motion, my obsession in orbit.

#02 - Cool

No cold shower or sea bathing can cool my ardor, Kakarotto, can wrench me from this lusciously loathsome longing.

#03 - Young

I remember your last words to me, my father, as you gave me into Lord Freeza's service: "Wherever you may roam, my son, you will never find genitals like unto a Saiyajins, never know balls as mighty as ours."

#04 - Last

Fool of a Saiyajin, last of our race, I would shun you, destroy you even, if only those orbs did not call to me, wake me in the night, screaming their scent of homeworld, of home.

#05 - Wrong

With no father to guide me and no people to follow me, who is to say what is right and what is wrong in a prince's obsession?

#06 - Gentle

I tremble and tingle as I gently caress my own royal orbs, hoping to lure you from aloofness that must be feigned, Kakarotto, for I know you are not immune to the call.

#07 - One

There is no other like me, Kakarotto, no greater princely power, and I will wait—in battle or in silence—until you recognize my perfection and offer your mouth and your Saiyajin balls up to my indomitable will.

#08 - Thousand

For the worship you owe my genital dominance, Kakarotto, what matter a wait of a thousand days, a thousand thousand?

#09 - King

Father, master and ruler of our race, how did we lose so much so easily, letting our world be taken so readily from us, leaving me alone with an idiot third-class warrior who denies me even his pathetic testicular offering?

#10 – Learn

Why will you not be taught, Kakarotto, not learn your place, on your knees and at my feet, tongue upon my twin treasures, triumphant in my generosity as you lick your way to Saiyajin salvation?

#11 - Blur

Our battle today is a blur, fists and blasts of power against the pale sky of a paltry planet; but each pass offers a waft of my regal scent, my testicles singing their supremacy and luring you to your destiny.

#12 - Wait

The longer we are forced to share this world together, Kakarotto, the more certain I am that the wait will be short until you surrender to your fate: sucking my noble Saiyajin balls until you are suffocated by their superiority.

#13 - Change

The woman waits for my obsession to end, but breasts—mere human dugs—can never compare with the supreme allure of Saiyajin balls.

#14 - Command

Damn and blast this whole dreaded, pitiful planet and every one of its inhabitants who do not obey my commands, who fail to recognize that I am the one true Saiyajin prince, and that they are not worthy to lick the shortest hair on my balls!

#15 - Hold

My fingers clench and release, my grip opens and closes around the imagined perfection of regal Saiyajin balls that exist only in my memory; how tragic it is, I think over and over, that with our race nearly extinct, I must settle for inferiority, for availability, for Kakarotto.

#16 - Need

Need is too pale a word for a Prince who craves the worship of his Saiyajin balls and the taste of another's.

#17 - Vision

O the terrible sight my eyes behold: you reach a hand casually into your training pants and scratch distractedly at balls so rare they should be encased in glass…or my slavering jaws.

#18 - Attention

"Easy now," I tell my cock, rigid unto aching as it cries out for attention above my shivering, perfect, Saiyajin balls; "he will serve us soon."

#19 - Soul

They say that he who pleasures even the most lowly of Saiyajin balls will feel the beauty of our race ring through his soul.

#20 - Picture

What a pretty picture, Kakarotto: your prince, sitting on your face, bringing you enlightenment you are too coarse ever to truly deserve in the form of firm, glorious, fleshly orbs.

#21 - Fool

Who is the bigger fool, he who offers a treasure beyond measure to an unworthy wretch or the unworthy wretch who rejects it?

#22 - Mad

On the madness of a planet whose moon waxes and wanes by month not by century, nothing is worth waiting for, not even the majesty of worthy Saiyajin balls!

#23 - Child

I will never forget the lesson I learned as a child when my father dropped his pants over my prone body and showed me graphically that a Saiyajin's testicles are his greatest prize.

#24 - Now

What moment is better than the present, Kakarotto, for us to stand, face to face, subordinate to prince, and share the firm grip of fist upon orbs?

#25 - Shadow

In the shadow of Earth's feeble moon, I stand, proud and erect, yet how I wish I had tail and could transform, watching my balls swell to magnificent proportions as I wrecked havoc!

#26 - Goodbye

Bend over and kiss your balls goodbye, Kakarotto, for when I lavish tongue and teeth upon their low-rank rankness, I will blow your weak little mind.

#27 - Hide

Images of flaying your hide from your body do not haunt me, Kakarotto, they thrill me, and I can think of no more delectable sight than your blood trickling down over those unworthy Saiyajin balls.

#28 - Fortune

Once I sought my fortune among the stars, a young prince without a planet, willful and ruthless; but time and circumstance change us all: my world has narrowed to two swollen orbs that taunt me as little else can.

#29 - Safe

Even in sleep I am not safe from dreams of testicular perfection that scatter in the morning light on a pathetic planet that is not my own.

#30 - Ghost

I hear my father's ghostly voice in my ears as visions of sweaty Saiyajin balls dance before my eyes in the night: possess that which threatens to possess you, my son, rule the unworthy and claim the spoils.

#31 - Book

Where, dare I ask, is it written that a low class warrior is permitted to have such terrible, enticing testes?

#32 - Eye

Would that I could spy with my little eye a pair of truly worthy Saiyajin balls!

#33 - Never

I know the expression, "never say never," but I never knew I would have to live it, Kakarotto, waiting upon your coy testicular imbecility!

#34 - Sing

Oh, how the body sings electric with the longing for a pair of perfect twin Saiyajin orbs, spicy and fragrant!

#35 - Sudden

I halt in the midst of training that could turn so perfectly lethal if only your balls were not the only game in town!

#36 - Stop

Oh, for fuck's sake, Kakarotto, stop it!

#37 - Time

In the dark of night I fondle myself furiously, wishing images of a lost world of worthy Saiyajin balls did not plague me across space and time.

#38 - Wash

It is really my voice, my mouth forming the words, "Can I wash those for you?"

#39 - Torn

There is the tiniest of tears at the groin of your training pants, Kakarotto, and I thrill that today you have gone commando.

#40 - History

Ours is a history of war, Kakarotto, of Saiyajin vs. Saiyajin, of warrior vs. warrior, of sac vs. sac.

#41 - Power

I may lack the power to pull my mind and my mitts away from those ripe orbs of yours, Kakarotto, but there is no weakness in my grasp.

#42 - Bother

"Oh bother," I mutter, seeing that I have once again stained my sheets in dreams of worthy Saiyajin balls.

#43 - God

How paltry is the Earthly sense of God, when he speaks not of the glory of the testicle!

#44 - Wall

On my homeworld, there was a massive stone wall into which warriors tucked scraps of paper on which were written their fervent prayers for mighty Saiyajin orbs.

#45 - Naked

The naked truth of our legacy rests deep within our Saiyajin balls.

#46 - Drive

I am made of raw drive, burning to conquer: the world and your balls, Kakarotto, the world and your balls.

#47 - Harm

There is no greater harm you can do a worthy Saiyajin warrior than to kick him in the balls…and laugh.

#48 - Precious

At last I have knocked you unconscious, hard-headed Kakarotto, and my tongue shall delve between your strong-muscled thighs to feast on the world's most precious fruit.

#49 - Hunger

Do you never, never hunger for a taste, Kakarotto?

#50 - Believe

Despite all evidence, all odds, I must believe that there exist other Saiyajin still alive in the universe, for without them I am trapped in the hellish orbit of my orb obsession.


	8. Bulma Speaks

26 July 2011

Note - Thought I'd give Bulma a chance to chime in...

**Bulma Speaks  
**

What do I think? You really want to know what I think? The guy's nuts. The children of royalty are usually pretty messed up. And if you've heard his story, especially all that weirdness with Frieza? It speaks for itself. I doubt there's a shrink around with enough patience for even one session with the mighty "Prince V." Doesn't surprise me that he's fixated on Goku. Nearest thing to a peasant he can "rule" over. But the balls thing? I haven't a clue. I mean, it's not like he's not into women. Well, me. Frankly, I'd have called him a tits-and-ass man if I didn't know he was staying up nights trying to think of ways to get Goku to teabag him again. Still, he's the father of my son, so I put up with it. The bitching and moaning and wrecking the anti-grav room with his temper tantrums. And I'll tell you something: the longer he doesn't get what he wants, the hotter he is in the sack. Big, raging, testicle-deprived Vegeta fucks like an animal. And i love it. He may be a muscle-bound ball freak from outer space, but he's my muscle-bound ball freak from outer space.


	9. The World is Bollocks!

20 November 2011

Note: Inspired by the "food porn" prompt at Hentai-contest. Almost a year since I began this tasty nonsense. May it never end.

**The World is Bollocks!  
**

There was no denying it, the world was conspiring to ruin Prince Vegeta's existence while Kakarotto was off being dead somewhere.

He endured breakfast with Bulma, holding up two fresh brown eggs, asking him if he'd like them boiled or fried.

He suffered playtime with Trunks (or Vegeta-son-of-Vegeta, as he called him), showing his dexterity by juggling two ripe red plums for his Papa.

He withstood Bulma's effusive mother's gift of two hairy russet kiwis, flown all the way from Australia.

He bore the sight of innumerable twinned cherries dangling from every tree in the orchard.

Predictably, it was Gohan, idiot offspring of idiot father, who at last did him in. "Catch!" he yelled, throwing a pair of coconuts his way. As always, he had more strength than he knew and less accuracy.

"Whoops!" cried the boy as Vegeta fell to the ground, clutching his bruised balls and fighting nausea.

Surrounded by his tormentors muttering their concern, when at last he caught his breath, he could only lie there and curse the gods that had reduced his fate to this.


End file.
